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The Last Time(Songfic)
NOTE:SPECIAL THANKS TO RAINY FOR THE NAME OF SMOKEHEART! The Last Time Sequel to: I Almost Do Found myself at your door, Just like all those times before, Smokeheart sighed, his paws shuffling back and forth as he tried to imagine what Goldenpetal would say when she saw him approaching her flowers in his jaw. Even after the confession she had made the last night... Smokeheart wasn't sure. He was scared of being rejected failure. Scared Goldenpetal might turn him down. Scared he wouldn't be able to convince her... ...convince her that he wasn't lying. And he actually had been thinking about her. I'm not sure how I got there, All roads they lead me here. He still wasn't sure how much he actually wanted to return to the she-cat with those glimmering golden eyes and that silky pelt. She was beautiful. And Smokeheart was pretty sure he still loved her. But his life hasn't been agonizing once she left, as it appeared to have been for Goldenpetal. Rather, it had seemed less stressed. I imagine you are home, In your room, all alone, Smokeheart was pretty sure that Goldenflower was in her den, and taking in a deep breath, he began to push himself towards the warriors den. Surely Goldenflower would accept. Last night she had made it clear that life without him was hard. And even if she didn't love him, Smokeheart was prepared to guess she wanted to be with him. And you open your eyes into mine, And everything feels better, "Hey!" Smokeheart was pulled out of his thoughts at the sight of Goldenflower, who was blinking at him curiously, her eyes dancing under the light. "Hello, Smokeheart," her ton was cautios and Smokeheart gently set the flowers he had been carrying I his jaws at her feet. "I got them for you." Goldenflower began to blush her cream cheeks turning a bright link color. "Thank you," she whispered. Right before your eyes, I'm breaking, no past No reasons why, The two of them were silent, almost meeting each others eyes as they both blushed redder and rede and redder, until Smokeheart finally smiled. "I'm glad you liked them," he claimed. "Where did you find them?" Goldenpetal asked, trying to create discussion. "Uh..." Smokeheart trailed off, deciding against telling her that he had just picked them up from the entrance to camp, "Somewhere by the lake." Goldenflower nodded gently, turning her head around to give her pelt a quick look. Then she shot Smokeheart an expectant glance. Just you and me. This is the last time I'm asking you this, Put my name at the top of your list, Both knew what she was daring him, asking him, and even begging him to do with the look that rested inside her eyes. And Smokeheart stumbled. "Uh... How's your day?" "Fine," Goldenpetal gave him a polite smile, "Yours?" "Busy but alright. The usual." This is the last time I'm asking you why, You break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye. Neither of them spoke. Finally Smokeheart sighed, "Have a nice day, Goldenpetal!" Disappointment was not hidden from the she-cats gaze. "Good day," she whispered, her tone low. As Smokeheart paddled away his guilt was clear, as was his reluctance and his regret as well as the feeling of shyness that hung around him. None of those feelings helped Goldenpetal feel any better. You find yourself at my door, Just like all those times before, Goldenpetal found herself shaking with furry as Smokeheart paddled away from her, harsh tears not failing to blind her eyes. "Are you alright?" Hailstorm was beside her, glancing at her curiously. "No," Goldenpetal murmured, turning around and marching away, failing at her attempt to ignore the building pain inside her chest. Smokeheart's denial had hurt. You wear your best apology, But I was there to watch you leave, She was furious with Smokeheart. But she was far more furious with herself. For ever thinking that the two of them could get back together. For ever thinking she could feel real love between the, again. For ever thinking that he was still the same tom he had been when they were mates. And now she was the one suffering for her own stupidity and pointless yet deadly how that had been quick to consume her heart. And all the times I let you in, Just for you to go again, That night Goldenpetal went to bed, hiding back tears that she has managed to sustain for a whole moon without much trouble. But suddenly, all of her practice with fighting them seemed worthless. At the hands of cruel fate and the way it twisted love, her love, there was no was she could win a war against tears. She was helpless. And so, Goldenpetal gently cried, trying to keep quiet in order to ensure that she didn't wake any of the sleeping warriors. Disappear when you come back, Everything is better. When Goldenpetal woke up the next morning there was a bundle of seven yellow flowers resting right before her nose which rested peacefully. She didn't need to be a genius to know they were from Smokeheart. A part of her was joyed at the sight of them. The other part was mad he couldn't just come out and ask her if they could be mates again. Because she was almost sure that he wanted it too. Right before your eyes, I'm aching, no past "Are you and Smokeheart back together yet?" Goldenpetal was approached by Deerskip later that day, "That's what I've been told." Goldenpetal would have loved to laugh, lean into her ear nodding and whisper all the details about how they had gotten back together. But they hadn't. "Don't believe everything you hear," Goldenpetal had snapped instead, whirling around and dashing for the exit to camp, as she raced out of the warriors' den. Nowhere to hide, Just you and me... Unfortunately, Smokeheart would have to be the one blocking her path to exit camp, a confused look in his gaze as he studied her. "Are you alright?" He questioned. "I'm fine," Goldenpetal snapped. Well, I actually am not but I would be if you were able to gather the courage to ask me to be your mate again Smokeheart seemed oblivious to her thoughts because he nodded, "You just seem a little worried and upset, that's all," he claimed. Goldenpetal fought back a new batch of tears as she pushed her way past him and continued to pedal along, completely ignoring him. This is the last time I'm asking you this, Put my name at the top of your list, Smokeheart sighed, watching Goldenpetal as she paddled out of camp, her footsteps gently pounding in his ears as he tried to put the facts together in his mind. He knew for a fact that Goldenpetal was beautiful, kind, sweet and definately a she-cat many toms should like. In fact, Smokeheart was pretty sure that was at least one another tom in the Clan with strong feelings for the cream colored she-cat. And Smokeheart was pretty sure he loved her. His heart did these little jumps every time her saw her, and he found himself unnecessarily nervous whenever in her presence. He even dreamed about her sometimes; and her gorgeous pelt, the ways her eyes glittered so fiercely every time they were struck by sunlight. This is the last time I'm asking you why, You break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye... But he knew something that made him unsure of whether or not she wanted to be mates with Goldenpetal again. Something about him... The pain in Goldenpetal's eyes when she spoke to him a couple nights ago... It was pain unlike anything he had ever felt; and pain unlike anything he doubted which he ever would be able to feel-yet Goldenpetal had. She had felt it for him. And he didn't return her emotions that powerfully. He was pretty sure it was dangerous to get into a relationship where the feelings weren't very close to mutuality. Goldenpetal loved him much more than he loved her. Which was what he worried about. This is the last time you tell me I've got it wrong, This is the last time I say it's been you all along, This is the last time I let you in my door, "Why won't you ask her?" A harsh voice asked behind him and Smokeheart whirled around to find Sharpstone giving him a curious glance, "It's obvious you both like each other." "We both did, I don't know if she likes me anymore." Sharpstone didn't buy his lie, "What's your real reason?" He demanded, "Are you only pretending to like her not to hurt her feelings because-" "No!" Smokeheart snapped, "I would never do anything like that to any she-cat! I'm smart enough to know that will only make things worse." "Why then?" Smokeheart sighed. This is the last time, I won't hurt you anymore. Oh, oh, oh, "She loves me more than I can ever like her," He sighed. "So you don't like her?" The tom seemed curious, "I could have sworn that both of you were deeply in love with one another." "I do!" Smokeheart sighed, "But she loves me so much more. She was broken beyond repair during the time we were apart, and I was just fine..." There was a moment of pause before Sharpstone nodded, "I see what you mean." "Then what should I do?" "Whatever your heart tells you to." This is the last time I'm asking you this, Put my name at the top of your list, Smokeheart sighed, even further confused and he turned his head up to the skies, praying to StarClan that they may show him something that might make his choice a little easier. He was almost positive there wasn't a right choice. He was taking a large risk by offering to Goldenpetal the opportunity to become mates again-the risk that he may break her heart even more than if he just declined her. He didn't want to be insensitive which was why he wanted to take time trying to decide what his choice would be. But the more he waited the worse it became. This is the last time I'm asking you why, You break my heart in the blink of an eye. Goldenpetal was returning from wherever she was coming from and Smokeheart was clearly aware that he had to make up his mind at that moment. He couldn't put it off any longer. So he decided, positive that his choice was the wrong one, but even more sure that the alternative choice was even an even worse one. "Goldenpetal?" He whispered, as she approached, "I need to tell you something?" Hope sparked in her eyes, "What's that?" This is the last time I'm asking you this Put my name at the top of your list This is the last time I'm asking you why There were several long moments of silence and Goldenpetal was almost sure that Smokeheart wasn't even going to say whatever he had planned to. Just like all those times before. But he did. "I wanted to tell you something important," He claimed, "Concerning us..." "What's that?" "I want to start with an apology..." You break my heart in the blink of an eye This is the last time I'm asking you, Last time I'm asking you, I'm sorry for leaving you when you needed me," He whispered, "I probably should have been more considerate than to start a fight with you..." "It takes two to fight," Goldenpetal reminded him, trying to keep herself out of the haze which she reached just by looking at him. "Yes, but I was ignoring you because of my duties as deputy." "I can respect that you are very busy as deputy," Goldenpetal claimed, not wanting to put the tom through too much guilt, "We are both at fault." "Yes," He claimed, "We were both at fault. But this time around there will be absoluetly nobody to blame but me, Goldenpetal, and I'm sorry." Last time I'm asking you this... This is the last time I'm asking you, Last time I'm asking you, "What do you mean?" "We can't do this." "Do what?" Goldenpetal felt her heart sinking as she realized quickly what he was talking about and how he was crushing all of her hopes. Last time I'm asking you this... This is the last time I'm asking you, Last time I'm asking you, "Be together." "Why?" Goldenpetal squeaked, fighting back a rush of warm tears that were reaching her eyes and she could tell that Smokeheart was struggling to continue. "I don't feel the same way about you-" He stopped and glanced at the ground in shame. "This is the last time," Goldenpetal sighed, "That I am giving you a chance to ask me to be your mate. After that I'm ignoring you-I'm tired of this!" Last time I'm asking you this... This is the last time I'm asking you, Last time I'm asking you, "I'm sorry," He sighed, "But this won't work, Goldenpetal." Harsh tears stung Goldenpetal's eyes as she watched him turn around, and gently paddle away; proud of herself for knowing that she wouldn't except him when he came back. Because he would. She was sure of it. She was tired of giving him chances to elevate her heart, only to have him smash the pieces further and pierce her insides so painfully with them. That had been the very last time. Last time I'm asking you this... Sequel: Holy Ground Category:Songfic Category:Robo's Fanfics Category:Robo's Songfics